Category: On Retiring

photo of woman sitting on rock
On Retiring, Post Retirement, Uncategorized

A New Perspective

shesfired

Yesterday, my husband sent me an article from Marketwatch written by a practicing CFP about people who had enough money to retire, but were afraid to. They simply weren’t sure they would like being retired. I smiled when I read it- I’m also a CFP and saw the same thing several times when I was working. The reason I was smiling though, is that its clear that my husband is now thinking about this.

I have to tell you that quitting a job can be absolutely terrifying, especially (like in my case) if the decision is irrevocable and a different job would mean a huge pay cut. It is also scary letting go of a stream of income that you’ve been living on for 25 years, and making the switch from saving to living on your assets. Remember that scene in one of the Indiana Jones movies when Harrison Ford stepped off of a cliff into what looked like an abyss? (There was an invisible bridge- he was fine.) Feels like that. Really, it does, even if you know you have plenty of assets. The day I turned in my resignation I felt physically nauseous all day.

Like the author of the article, I didn’t really understand the enormity of the change when I was advising clients. I could show them on graphs and reports that they had enough assets, explain how they were going to address each challenge, and pay for each expense, and yet they were still afraid. It’s a huge life change and its not just about money. I get it now.

My perspective is quite different now that I am retired. The things I thought were really important while I was working, turned out to be much less important to me now that I’m not working anymore. And I have to say, that I think that advice about retiring “TO” something rather than just retiring to get away from your job is well meant, but it isn’t very helpful in real life. Most of the plans I had for what to occupy my time with in retirement seem less attractive now, and I never even considered the things I’m currently enjoying. The point of all this is that the view looks very different from the other side- you cannot accurately view what your retirement will look like when you are working, because working colors your view of your life.

Back to my husband. We argued about my retirement a fair amount before I did it. He really thought I was going to regret leaving my job. And in his defense, I am a really “busy” AKA hyperactive person. I am always DOING something. He was genuinely worried that my job was a major outlet for my mental energy and that I was going to be bored without some problem to solve. I’m just solving different kinds of problems, and that’s even more fun to me. Yesterday I fixed a connection issue with our wireless printer and learned how to use some additional features in Google Docs. I’ve never thought of myself as a “tech” person, but it was fun, and my 13 year old, who had been unable to fix the problem, was impressed.

I couldn’t convince my husband that I wouldn’t be bored in retirement, but seeing is believing. I’m having such a good time with MY hobbies, that he is spending a little more time on HIS hobbies- and enjoying them. He told me yesterday that he was going to cut back on his work schedule this year. He has said this countless times in the past, but he’s been talking about buying an RV and going camping for several weeks at a time. He might mean it this time.

Financial Stuff, On Retirement, On Retiring, Uncategorized

We Saved Too Much for Retirement

shesfired

We didn’t mean to, but we saved too much for retirement- way too much. This happened for a few reasons, including marital politics and a retirement package that I would get if I waited just a LITTLE longer. Thanks to a roaring bull market and being heavily invested in equities, we now have about twice my original savings target. Due to the retirement package, we won’t need to take a dime out of the portfolio for at least three more years. If we started spending now, we’d be withdrawing 2% of our portfolio- far less than our 3.5% target. In a few years my husband will be old enough to get Social Security which will reduce the withdrawal rate below 1.5%. We are actually having trouble wrapping our heads around our current account balance. We never expected to have so much.

Having this much money wasn’t really the goal- the goal was just to get away from my job. After the ’08-09 recession, I decided I didn’t want to work in my industry any longer. Unfortunately unemployment was sky-high, and I was the only thing keeping some of my clients invested in the market. I didn’t want to abandon them when things seemed so uncertain. I didn’t know what else I wanted to do, I only knew I was tired of what I’d been doing for the last 13 years. Like everyone else’s finances, ours were slow to recover after the recession. Early retirement didn’t look like a possibility until 2012 or 2013. At that point all the investments we purchased when the market was at rock bottom were looking brilliant, my job was more tolerable, and I was making more money than I ever had. I was still looking at other jobs, but I would have had to take a huge pay cut. I ran the numbers, and if I stayed where I was and continued to invest like we had been, I could retire in 2017 or 2018. If I changed jobs, I would be working longer.

Just before 2017, when I was looking seriously at turning in my notice, the company came out with a really good retirement plan. It included several years of severance pay and access to health insurance, which was increasingly attractive in an uncertain healthcare environment. The best part about it was that my husband liked the idea. Up until this point he had been completely against me quitting my job. The worst part is that I didn’t qualify for it because I was too young. I would have to wait till February 2020 to do it. My husband loved that part too. The severance pay added a degree of safety to the plan that I appreciated, since I’d seen first hand how fast a plan dependent on market returns could go wrong. I decided to stay even though our assets reached the “safe retirement number” by December of ’17. The market continued its upward climb, and by the time I was “old enough” to retire, we had much more than the original goal.

We don’t LOOK like we have this much money. I drive a 3 year old Subaru that I bought used, my husband (like most other men where we live) drives a pickup truck- a pretty average one. Our house is very nice, but not especially large or luxurious. I don’t really care about designer things, so I don’t have any, though I will admit that my kids sport the usual assortment of athletic brands on their clothes and shoes. They have about average for the kids where we live. The only way people would know is that we take long vacations to some interesting (and not cheap) locations.

We don’t really want anyone to know our financial situation. It was the thing I was most nervous about when I announced that I was going to retire. I had to call all of my clients, and when you call 300 people in a small town, EVERYONE will know. Some people already knew the “scoop” by the time I called them on the second day. There are a lot of stay-at-home moms around here, and I’m trying to masquerade as one of those. When people asked, I implied that I plan on getting another job after a few years off. People treat you differently when they know you have money, and not always in a good way.

I suspect our spending has gone up a bit since the last time I tracked it. I stopped looking at it for a while when I was busy working, but I am logging expenses again. Even tracking it for just a little while, I have noticed some areas that could be improved. Do I need to improve them? Probably not, but I dislike waste. I’m still frugal. I can’t seem to help it and neither can my husband, but as we have accumulated a somewhat daunting net worth, we have relaxed a little about our spending.

My more relaxed attitude about money doesn’t seem like a big deal, but its lovely not to obsess about every purchase. We spent a weekend in the mountains recently, just to get out of the house. For a lot of reasons, including some changes in the weather, it wasn’t really much fun. It wasn’t cheap either. A few years ago, I’d have been upset that our trip didn’t go as planned, and that the accommodations were not as advertised, but I’m a little more relaxed about it now. It would be lovely to make optimal decisions about everything, every time, but life doesn’t work that way. No point in being upset about that. We have decided that vacation is not the time to be penny-pinching, or to beat yourself up over a spending mistake. It interferes with fun, which is the point of vacation, so stop it already.

We are upgrading a few things and tending to some overdue maintenance. We finished the barn behind our house and made a really nice workshop that my husband and kids are enjoying. That freed up some storage space to make a nice potting shed for me. We also built a pergola over the back porch and finished an outdoor grilling station we had been meaning to install since we moved in 8 years ago. We’re going to put new gravel at the camp because it becomes a muddy mess when it rains. I hate the chest freezer I bought for the house, and we’re going to buy an upright one, even though there is nothing wrong with the one we have. I’m even considering laser surgery for my eyes. Contacts worked well for me when I was young, but my aging eyes like them less every year. We might even start flying business class for longer trips.

We have thought about increasing our daily spending habits, but haven’t done it for a couple of reasons. The first is that we have everything we need and most of what we want. We’re not comfortable with being “flashy.” We both grew up in rural areas and are used to a low-key lifestyle. Honestly, if you stopped by my house in the summertime, you’d probably see me barefoot in the yard with my hair in a ponytail. Our typical get-togethers with friends are barbecuing in the backyard, drinks around someone’s fire pit, or kayaking on one of the local waterways. A friend who moved here from New York City told me that his favorite thing about living here is that its so cheap to have a good time.

Where we live, its actually harder to spend money. There are very few restaurants to choose from (and none of them are fabulous) and its a half hour drive to a mall or shopping center. Until last year, we didn’t even have a coffee shop. There is only one club to join in town. Its a golf club and we don’t play. Also, thanks to the coffee incident, we have learned that making luxuries a habit can make you LESS happy, and we certainly don’t want to do that. The occasional treats have become a little more frequent, though.

From a strictly financial point of view, its obvious I could have retired a few years ago. It is a pointless exercise to analyze whether or not I made the correct decision, but I can’t seem to help doing it. And I do know that people justify whatever decision they made as the right one, even if the evidence is to the contrary. I’ve had several people tell me that they sold their stock investments at the bottom of the market decline in 2009, but that was a good decision, because they paid their house off, or whatever.

The results of the choice I didn’t make (retiring at 44 instead of 48) are unknowable, but there are a few decisions that might have been different. We stumbled on a cabin on a local river that we bought and have come to love. It was a purchase we probably would not have made had I not been working at that time. We were grateful to have it last summer when every other fun thing to do got cancelled. A year ago, our 16 year old began having some issues that we couldn’t seem to solve. A private school was an option that we probably wouldn’t have considered due to the hefty tuition. We decided to enroll him and it has turned out to be a wonderful solution.

I don’t know what our portfolio is doing on a daily basis anymore. I know that’s partly because I’m not at work staring at stock quotes all day, but its nice not to have to think about it so much. I thought I’d be even more worried about our finances since I will soon no longer have a paycheck, but that hasn’t been the case.

The last few years at work were pretty miserable, and retirement so far has been wonderful. Did I make a good trade by sticking out the last few years? Impossible to say for sure, but maybe I did.

stream of river among rocky formations in forest
On Retiring, Uncategorized

Explaining retirement at 48

shesfired

Early retirement has been my goal since 2009, and over the last 11 years I’ve worked pretty hard at it. I’ve saved, and planned, and imagined how awesome it was going to be.  I was in a pretty good position even before 2009. I saved a good portion of my salary because I told my clients they needed to. I felt like I couldn’t tell them to do what I wasn’t willing to do myself. I married my husband in 2002, and he was in even better financial shape than I was. He is older, he’d been contributing to his 401K longer, was making more money than I was, and he hadn’t gone through a divorce. We worked hard, saved a lot, didn’t buy new cars, etc.

I didn’t tell many people, and the reactions from the people I did tell were mixed.  A few were bewildered at why I’d want to, some were supportive of my “goal” (though most of those didn’t take me seriously) and some just thought it was a bad idea and told me I’d be bored. I persisted, keeping progress discussions between myself and my husband, and sometimes an online retirement forum.

I’d been told that notifying clients would be rough, but I wasn’t expecting some of the reactions I got. People seemed to be upset because I was able to retire young. A client and acquaintance of myself and my husband, about my age, was incredulous and angry. “You mean to tell me that you and your husband have enough money to retire??” I couldn’t think of anything to say at first except “Erm, yes.” Not very smooth of me, I know. I was really taken aback.

For some background info, “John” has a stay at home wife, two teenage kids in private school and some very nice vehicles in his driveway. I thought quickly. “You know John, my job is very stressful and I’ve been at it for nearly 25 years. My kids are teenagers now and I’d like to be at home with them a little more. I’m taking the company offered retirement plan because it lets me choose the advisors who will be taking over for me and personally introduce them to my clients. I don’t know that I’m retired forever, but I need a little time off…”

I couldn’t believe what I’d just heard come out of my mouth. Did I just make excuses for achieving a goal I had been working towards for 11 years? Yes I did. I was horrified at myself, and more than a little upset. I was mentally done for the day after that.

After a stiff workout and a glass of wine I thought about the conversation. I sort of thought most people were going to be happy for me. There were a few, but the average reaction I was getting was not positive. It turned out that nearly everyone thought it was a bad idea for one reason or another. Were they right, or was something else going on?

Pretty shortly after that, I found out that John’s wife, who had never worked before, was looking for a job. I wondered if the company he worked for was doing well and if he had concerns for his own job. It began to occur to me that its not that people weren’t happy for me, they weren’t really thinking of me at all. They were using my news to measure their own lives.

Perhaps (like my husband) a strong work ethic is a very important to them. They like to work and can’t understand why I don’t want to (I sense this from a lot of older men.) Perhaps they were just beginning to realize that retirement was looming and they hadn’t saved enough. Me retiring was not a pleasant reminder of what they could have done. Or maybe my plan was so foreign to them that they just couldn’t imagine it. Everyone seems to think the choices they make are the best ones. Maybe early retirement seemed like a bad idea, because if was a good idea, they’d have done it themselves.

I began to explain my retirement somewhat differently to people depending on THEIR situation. To the older retired men who sometimes worked 40 years at their jobs, I reminded them of their wives who stayed at home, and that I wanted to do that too, before my kids were grown and gone. To people with kids my age or older, I reminded them how stressful teenagers could be, and I simply needed more time with them than my job allowed, or some time off and a career change. To teachers and anyone who works for local or state government, I point out that I have my “25 years in.” Most of them retire after 25 years of service with a pension.

Some people seem to object for an entirely different reason- because I’m young, they thought I’d be around long enough to help sort out their estates. I don’t really have an answer for that one except that I did my best to leave them in good hands.

Sometimes I get comments that I’m too young to young to retire, or that I’m too smart and personable to just sit at home. I wonder if my sister (who for years was a stay at home mom by choice) ever heard this sort of thing. I decided it was a “funeral home comment”- you know, the sort of thing people say when they don’t know what to say. I’ll just take that as a compliment, since I think that’s how it was meant.

I was concerned clients would think that I was able to retire early because I charged them so much, but I haven’t gotten that impression (and it isn’t true). A few of them joked that I really AM good at retirement planning- look how well I planned my own!

I thought that I would announce my retirement with pride- Because I am proud that I’ve been able to do this. I’ve come to realize though, that a lot of the reactions I’m getting are about them, not me. If it makes other people feel better that I want to be a stay at home mom, that’s fine with me. And all of that is the truth, its just the truth that seems easiest for them to understand.

Some people get it though- a pal at the gym was delighted for me, and said he only had two years to go himself. He told me that some days his job was so stressful he didn’t know how he’d make it. I confessed to all the days I was at the end of my rope and looked at my countdown to retirement app for comfort. He downloaded it before he left the gym.

** I wrote a different post for this week but I decided I didn’t like it. I was looking for a half-finished post to work on, and I found this one that I wrote about 8 months ago and for some reason, hated. I like it now, so I’m publishing it instead. Maybe I’ll like the one I wrote this weekend in a month or two…

On Retiring, Uncategorized

My Husband Is Never Going to Retire

shesfired

Years ago when we were talking about retirement, my husband said he was going to retire when I did. In retrospect, I think he was trying to increase the amount of money needed for the retirement goal, so I would continue to work. And I did, for a while.

I told my dad, morosely, over the holidays, that I had come to the realization that my husband isn’t going to retire. Possibly ever. My dad laughed. He couldn’t believe that I’d ever thought my husband would. He calls my husband a workaholic.

What brought this realization on, is a conversation we had about some friends of ours. He owns his own business and his wife was a school teacher- until this year. She quit to work a few hours a week in his office. My husband was horrified by this decision, because teachers have amazing benefits, the most important of which (in case you are not from the U.S.) is inexpensive health insurance. The net effect is probably -$70,000 (or more) per year on their household income. They could hire the work he needs done for less than $10K per year.

I understand perfectly though. I tried to explain that if they could afford to do that, and wanted to, that there is nothing wrong with that decision. I asked if his friend’s mom was a homemaker, that they might both enjoy having her at home. “Yeah, his mom stayed at home”, he said, “and his dad too, practically.” My husband related that his friend’s dad had worked for a local company that had closed its doors. The company offered the dad a position at a plant in another state- OR an early retirement package. His friend had been in high school at the time, and had younger siblings.

“Can you believe” my husband said “That he took a reduced retirement instead of taking that job? And he was younger than ME.” Could I believe that the man didn’t uproot his family, including some teenagers, and move them two states away for a job he didn’t really need? Yes, I can.

My husband suddenly remembered who he was talking to- his 8 years younger, RETIRED wife. His mouth snapped shut and he grinned sheepishly. He didn’t say it, but I got the implication. Lazy. He even called me that once, though the resulting fight made it unlikely I’ll hear it again.

My husband is in the best of (I think) work situations. He’s a contract employee, which means if he has something that interferes with his work, (like vacation or fishing) he simply declines the contract. They pay him for completed work, and usually have some sort of time frame, but its flexible enough for him to fit family time or leisure time in. He doesn’t deal with corporate BS, or if he does, declines to work for that company again. We certainly don’t need the money, and he’s good at what he does, and very reliable. He gets more phone calls about available jobs than he has time to complete.

He actually loves work. He had actually not intended to be in town today. He was fishing until the weather turned bad, so he came home a day early. As soon as the rain stopped this morning, he put on his boots and trotted out the door to get some work done. My husband has a wonderful work ethic and I admire that about him. It makes me feel safe knowing he’s willing to work hard to make sure we are all warm, fed, and safe. Heck, he’s willing to work hard even if we don’t need him to.

I have decided that I don’t mind that he doesn’t want to retire. I’m perfectly happy puttering around the house (thank you COVID) or doing activities without him. We traveled a pretty fair amount before I retired, and he was always happy to go on those trips. I plan on traveling at least that much, and probably more when the world returns to normal. He’ll probably come, and if he doesn’t, that’s okay too. Since my business was helping people retire, I saw more than one marriage struggle with the transition to retirement. We haven’t had that.

My husband and I have a really good marriage. I still love being with him and think he’s the most interesting man on earth. We both have a pretty strong need to be alone, though. I have, at times during our marriage, looked at him and asked, “Don’t you want to go fishing/hunting this weekend?” He (fortunately) thinks this is pretty funny. I frequently disappear from the living room when my menfolk are watching loud action movies on TV and curl up in our room in a chair with a book.

Perhaps its best he doesn’t want to retire- if he did, we’d have to figure out how to give each other enough space. Does it bother me that he thinks I’m lazy for quitting my job? It probably would have 10 years ago. I no longer think that everyone, including my husband, has to think the way I do. I’m not willing to argue about it- you are welcome to your beliefs, whatever they are. I’ve discovered that arguing almost never changes anyone’s mind, and I hate arguing with my husband. I certainly don’t care enough to get another job!

On Retiring, Uncategorized

So I Have to Go Back to Work…

shesfired

In case you haven’t been following the story, I began my retirment exactly one month before Coronavirus shut my job down. The plan was to call all the clients and tell them that I am retiring, and then meet with them and the new advisor to explain the client situation, investments, and anything else either party needed to know. The meeting with clients part was supposed to take 3-4 months. I had time to call all the clients and tell them about my retirement, but 2 days before the appointments were to begin, the company shut all face-to-face client meetings down.

I helped the new advisors as much as I could over the next few months but had to cut my hours back again and again, because as they improved, they needed me less. This week, the company told us that it was time to start meeting with clients again. That means I have to dig out my high heeled shoes, and go back to work.

For a while there I thought I wasn’t going to get to meet with the clients again at all. I was afraid that by the time the company allowed us to meet with clients, I might no longer even work there. I wasn’t sure how I felt about that. I thought meeting with everyone one more time would make the job feel completed or something. Closure maybe?

I know how I feel about it now. I don’t want to go back to working full time. I love working my measly 7.5 hours per week. I love lingering over my coffee. I like working out in the mornings and having my afternoons to myself.


The most annoying part about all this, is that if it weren’t for coronavirus, I’d have been done with all this months ago! I thought at some point I might like to go back to work teaching at the university or something like that, but perhaps not. I’ve clearly adapted to a loose schedule, and I like it.

I’m probably overreacting a bit. The clients have been working with their advisors for 6 months now. I was in the office the other day and picked up the phone (because I was the only person in the office not already on the phone) and the person on the other end was a client I had worked with for 20 years. After chatting for a moment, SHE ASKED FOR HER NEW ADVISOR. She didn’t even want to discuss whatever she needed with me.

I wonder how many clients will want to meet with me at all at this point. Some still won’t want to come in because of Coronavirus. Some are already used to the new advisor and don’t see the need to meet. I guess I’m about to find out. Hopefully I’ll be done meeting with everyone who wants to by Christmas, and will only go into the office on an “as-needed” basis after that. Keep your fingers crossed.

On Retiring, Uncategorized

Surprising Things About Semi-Retirement

shesfired

The post I was working on just won’t come out right. I’m going to let that one marinate for a bit. Here is the other thing I have been thinking about.

I expected the things I loved (and didn’t) to be the same after I had lots of free time. Surprise! Work had an even bigger effect on my likes and dislikes than I thought.

Surprise #1 – I used to love lounging in bed. I would do it every chance I got- which wasn’t very often. My husband (bless him) would sometimes bring me a cup of coffee and I’d read, or just lay there and think. And for the first month or so after I stopped working full time I did it A LOT. Then I just sort of stopped. This morning my next door neighbor and dear friend E spotted me leaving my driveway at 6:45. She called me immediately. “What are you doing?” she asked. “Going to the gym” I answered. Complete silence on the other end. “Ummmm, why?”

6 months ago I had NEVER been to the gym that early- I never even wanted to. It turns out that I like working out in the morning, and I love the gym when its nearly empty. My usual time to go before semi- retirement was 4:30 pm, and it was ALWAYS jammed. Last week I went to the gym mid afternoon and it was packed. I turned around and left. In addition to virus concerns, I just don’t like bunches of people in the gym. I have time, I’ll just come back later.

Even on days that I don’t have anything to do in the morning, I get out of bed. I have coffee with my husband instead of in bed by myself. I go to bed earlier too. I have no idea why I don’t want to laze in bed anymore, I just don’t. My mom swears I was a morning person when I was a kid. Could I be reverting?

Surprise #2 – For years (at least 10) I have had a standing lunch date with a girlfriend- J. She also has a stressful job and runs an office (with all the same employee issues, etc) but in a different field. It is therapy for both of us and we both look forward to it all week. We have both confessed to looking at our calendars and asking ourselves how much longer till Thursday “girl lunch”. Last week I forgot. I did not remember till I was cooking dinner that night. When we finally had lunch yesterday, J teased me about it, and she also commented how relaxed I’ve been looking lately. As always, we had a great time at lunch, and I plan on continuing our lunch dates, I just enjoy them instead of needing them as a stress outlet. I’m going to have to put them on the calendar now so I don’t forget again.

Surprise #3 – Slowing down has affected everything- even my driving! This has been a very good thing as the police chief in my town has recently grown fond of speed traps. I passed 3 police cars parked and waiting for speeders on my way to the gym this morning, and its only 7 miles away. I didn’t even have to brake- I’m not in a hurry, and I’m not speeding.

Surprise #4 – A change in plans doesn’t make me as irritable as it used to. After taking my child to the dentist yesterday, I had planned on taking him to get a haircut. He didn’t want one. I told him that was fine, but we’d be doing it early next week. He agreed- no fight. 6 months ago I couldn’t have said with any certainty that I would have had time for an extra errand next week- especially not since its the week before school starts. I’d have dragged him to the barbershop and one (or likely both of us) would have been crabby about it.

Surprise #5- I have been saying yes to things (and people) I wouldn’t have when I was working. I had so little free time when I was working that the opportunity had to be awesome for me to accept it. But now I have much more free time, so I’m less picky. A lawyer friend asked me to explain some confusing things in a client’s brokerage statements (the account was not with me). The client was accused of losing large sums of money, but for a number of reasons, the claims weren’t adding up. I just love figuring out a problem. It was fun- and I had plenty of time to do it.

I also got invited to an outing with a group of girls I like, but don’t know very well. I’m kind of socially awkward, and I was kind of hesitant about going, but it was FUN! Now that I know them better, I will feel more comfortable around them next time.

Surprise #6 – I am not as obsessed with vacation. I don’t have a single thing planned. This comes at an excellent time, because there is not much chance of us taking a vacation. Every vacation this year except a hiking trip to Utah got cancelled. My goal is 3 vacations a year (this includes camping trips etc). It wasn’t so important where we went, only that we were able to get AWAY. Now, its okay if we don’t. I like planning vacations, but I’m not nearly as frustrated with the “no travel” situation as I thought I would be.

Conversely, I still have a need to be alone, and I wasn’t aware that work served that purpose sometimes. This has been the longest summer of my life and I’ve had a little too much “family time”. In short, my kids are driving me crazy, and my garden is not far enough away. I am fortunate that I am in a position that I can close the door to my office and ask not to be disturbed for an hour or two. I also find myself sneaking off to “the Camp” mid-week.

David from iretiredyoung.net asked for a post about the camp. That one is coming up next- unless I can get that other post to work… Stay tuned.

On Retiring, Uncategorized

So, How’s Retirement Going?

shesfired

I’ve been asked this a lot lately. The truth is, I’m still working 4 days a week and I don’t consider myself retired until I don’t have to go in anymore. But my life is so different now that I’m not working full time.

I”m going into work at nine or so and I’m out of there by lunch. My afternoons are all mine and my mornings are no longer rushed. Its wonderful. When people ask though, its hard to convey just how wonderful not being in a hurry anymore is. They keep asking what I’m DOING, and it doesn’t sound all that exciting. It isn’t exciting, but it is SO much less stressful.

I used to be the only person at the office who was capable of helping clients with certain things. Now, I’m not. If I’m not there (and I’m not there a lot) someone else can do it. Very very few of my clients had my cell phone number, but one of them had it and called me on it regularly. The last time he called me (on my day off with my family at the river) I just declined it. There was someone at the office who could help him with whatever the emergency of the day was.

I’ve never been all that good at mornings, and now I don’t have to pretend. I used to rush around trying to get the kids ready and me ready and do a load of dishes or laundry before I left for work so the house wouldn’t be such a disaster when I got home. I like reading in the morning, and I’ve discovered that I love puttering around the garden in my jammies and garden clogs with a cup of coffee. I pick a few weeds, pick a few vegetables and muse on whether the perfect place for a plant is its current location.

My garden looks glorious. I like cottage style gardens which is a good thing as I have a lamentable habit of sticking plants wherever there is room, and wanting to move them the next year. Unfortunately, the time that you notice that they are in the wrong location (summer) is exactly they worst time to move them. By the time its a good time to move them (fall), I don’t have time to do it, or I have forgotten which and where the plants are that I wanted to move. This year, I have actually marked the plants that need to be moved and taken photographs. I started a garden journal with plans of where they need to go, and I have a reminder in my calendar so I don’t forget to do it.

For the first time ever, I’m doing a mid-summer re-plant of the garden. Certain crops (cucumbers, squash and tomatoes) just quit in the unbelievable heat and humidity of a deep south summer. I had heard of people replanting them mid summer, but I’d never done it. It is too hot to be in the garden anytime except early in the morning and nearly dark. That is the only time to do ANY outside chore here in June, July, and August, and I never seemed to have time to do it. I am going to do it tomorrow- I’ll let you know the results soon.

I have been better at keeping up with the bounty of my garden. This year when faced with an avalanche of tomatoes that ripened all at once, I didn’t give them all away (only some) or let them go bad on the vine. I borrowed my neighbor’s dehydrator and sliced and dried them. You can’t make sun-dried tomatoes here because the humidity is too high, but the dehydrator ones taste every bit as good. The experiment with squash chips wasn’t quite as successful, but I’ll try it again with a few modifications.

Some days if I have something to do in the afternoon, I go to the gym before work. It is blessedly empty at 7am. If I don’t go in the morning, I get a workout in before lunch. I am working out more than I managed to before retirement and I’m enjoying leisurely workouts. I no longer have to cut workouts short to get dinner on the table at a decent hour. I also don’t have to bunch chores together in order to get everything done. I don’t like going to the grocery store in gym clothes after a workout and I don’t have to do it anymore.

I’m enjoying cooking more, as I have plenty of time to decide what to cook and plenty of time to do it in. I’d like to claim that my house is cleaner, but it probably isn’t. I’m happier about doing household chores though- probably because I’m not trying to cram them in before work or do them after work when I’m tired.

I’m visiting more- my parents live only about an hour and a half from me now, and I’m going to see them this weekend. I’ll probably stay a day or two, and its close enough I can even go mid-week if they need me. I have a neighbor who likes to have coffee occasionally. Probably half of our attempts to get together were unsuccessful due to scheduling- either her work schedule or mine. We get together more often now because we can.

While this all sounds boring to people who ask me what I’m doing in retirement, its exactly what a book I recently read on happiness prescribes. Am I happier? I am.

On Retiring, Uncategorized

3 Months In

shesfired

I officially began my retirement transition 3 months ago, and I’m sure you all know this did not go according to plan. I’m pretty sure no one’s life has gone according to plan lately. I did not expect the pandemic to play out like it did. I did not expect a lot of things that have transpired over the last 3 months. So here is what was supposed to happen and what has actually happened-

My first step was to call every client and explain what was happening, and then set appointments to go over the transition in person with the client and my replacement. I had no idea the calls would be so horrible, or so wonderful. I heard clients express their fear and anger- it was painful. But I also got the kind of compliments one only usually hears at a funeral. The difference I made in someone’s life, the mistakes I saved them from and more. It was humbling, and gratifying. Sometimes the angry calls and grateful calls were one after the other. It was disorienting to say the least.

And then the week we were supposed to begin meeting with clients, everything seemed to fall apart. The company I work for forbade us from meeting with clients. Then my mom got sick with COVID-19. Very sick. Everyone else in my family got sick too, but not like my mom. I thought she was going to die. That one I wrote about, but other family problems, I didn’t. It seems like my whole family was poised to fall apart as soon as I had time to worry about it. Marriages falling apart, a major move, mental and physical health issues, and teenagers- it hasn’t been smooth.

After mom got sick, I stayed home because I’d been in contact with my mom for the requisite 2 weeks but then attempted to resume my former work schedule. It was pretty futile. I was twiddling my thumbs with nearly nothing to do. For the first time in my career, there was someone else to take care of all the tasks I was previously needed for. It was weird for a bit. I could hear my assistant passing my clients off to someone else. She only gave them to me when they would talk to no one else. It was strange. My clients didn’t need me anymore. Even worse, after a month or so of my assistant putting them through to my replacement, they didn’t even ASK for me. I became redundant.

And then, it became a wonderful thing. I was free. If I was gone, somebody else could do it. Heck, even if I WAS there, somebody else could do it. I became a consultant. I LOVE this. After 23 years, I know a ridiculous amount about my field. My replacements are doing an apprenticeship with me- every time they find themselves in a situation not covered by “the book” or corporate training (which happens nearly every day) they call me in for advice, and we have a lesson. One of my replacements has a notebook and she WRITES DOWN EVERYTHING I SAY. LOL.

I began working about 3 hours a day. I am enjoying the heck out of this. Before I go in the work I have TIME- time for a leisurely cup of coffee. Time to pull a few weeds in my garden, to do a few Cinderella chores (you know, laundry, dishes, cleaning, etc), and generally, not be in a hurry. I took my morning exercise in a nearby pitcher plant bog (above photo was taken there). I have time to have coffee with my neighbors. After enjoying this and receiving a few pass along plants after walking through THEIR gardens, I organized a plant swap for this fall.

I probably wouldn’t have been focused on retiring early if this had been my schedule for the last several years. I still want to retire completely, because when the world goes back to normal, I want to travel, and I want my time to be completely my own.

A few clients have extended “friend” invitations. These were clients I enjoyed very much, who suddenly invited my husband and I to social events. Surprising, and… welcome. I think. Of course, it all got shut down by the shutdown. I’ll keep you posted on how the “former client” friendships go after we’re free to explore them- or not.

I’m not going to tell you about the work issues. There have been some issues I could never imagined, not even relating to the pandemic. A lovely mental separation is happening though- it has sort of become “not my problem.” Some of it is still stressful, but some of it just seems like something you’d see on TV- you experience it mentally, but not emotionally. Thank goodness. I can’t believe how much better I sleep at night. I had no idea the extent to which my clients’ problems had become my problems till it didn’t happen anymore.

Several times in the last few months, clients have asked me how the stock market closed and I didn’t even know. Or care. I had either left work at noon and hadn’t checked again, or was off and didn’t even look. And I think I am going to be even less stressed when I stop going in at all. Whenever that happens.

There was a conference call today (that I didn’t attend) about when we will be able to meet with clients again and all that. Probably not till September. No corporate events till there is a vaccine. I can’t really stop going in to the office till I’ve met with every client who wants to. So I thought I would be done July 1. Maybe Dec 1 now? And saying goodbye to my colleagues at a final party or meeting? I don’t think its going to happen. But you know what? I don’t regret it much. The freedom is worth it.

On Retiring, Uncategorized

Part time….

shesfired

I had been going into work every day, and trying to work. On Monday I decided that this was ridiculous. I was doing a couple of hour’s worth of work, and trying not to be bored the rest of the day. So I told my assistant and the new broker in the office that I would be coming in at 9:30 and leaving around lunch. If they needed me for something I would attend to it then.

On Tuesday morning I picked blackberries before work. On Wednesday morning I worked out. Thursday morning I planned on doing a bit of gardening, but my oldest son requested breakfast, so I did that instead. After work I have done more garden chores, house chores, and planned my weekend. I got a box of plants I ordered in January and was delighted to get them. I put them in the ground same day!

I convinced my parents to come and visit this weekend. My parents are the safest people we could have over- they’ve already had Coronavirus and are 3 weeks from fever. That required shopping, cleaning, etc, all of which I had plenty of time for. I wasn’t completely stressed when they got here- I was drinking a glass of iced tea on the patio. We had a lovely relaxed visit- it was so good to hug my mom and dad.

Work went pretty well last week- when I arrived int the morning there was actually something TO DO. I left when I was supposed to and 2 out of the 4 days, I got phone calls, both of which could have been handled the next day. One of the issues HAD to be handled the next day because I couldn’t see what she was talking about. But I didn’t mind- it wasn’t a bother and I wasn’t stressed.

Two months ago I was pretty focused on getting retirement tasks done so I could be out of there forever. Then I was stressed because I couldn’t do them. I’m feeling better about this whole thing. Its certainly going to take longer than I’d planned, but I don’t mind going to the office for the limited time I’m there now.

Its less stressful because I’m no longer responsible for everything. Also, less time at the office means that I’m not in a hurry when I’m not there. I love that. Also, for the first time in 23 years, I’m not wearing heels and business clothes every day- jeans are so much more comfortable! When we can schedule client meetings again, I think I’m going to be a little more relaxed about it. I was hoping to be out for good by July, but this part-time stuff is pretty tolerable. It’ll be fine if I’m done by late fall.

On Retiring, Other Stuff, Uncategorized

What a Mess…

shesfired

I have now called all of my clients. Really the first two days were the worst. Thanks to the market decline, everyone called me back pretty quickly. Some conversations were good, some were bad, and some were indifferent.

All the while the market was sinking, and sinking, and sinking. And the world was getting progressively crazier. Somewhere in there my company announced that “…for the safety of our clients and our employees, we are no longer allowing our financial advisors to meet with clients face to face…” I was quite annoyed about this, since the terms of my retirement contract require me to meet with every client (who wants to) with their new advisor, but it turned out to be a good idea.

This morning, my mom tested positive for Covid19. Which means I’m quarantined because I saw her weekend before last. I don’t have any symptoms, and I read that 97% of patients have symptoms by the 10th day (I’m at 9.5) so I’m pretty sure I don’t have it. I called HR and they told me to go home and don’t come back till I was past 14 days exposure to my mom- that’s Monday. I don’t know whether to try to get tested or not. I said TRY because I know of a few people who have fevers or other symptoms who were told they could not have a test. And my mom (who only had a fever) was told that they wouldn’t have given her a test if she hadn’t been over 70 and my dad was told that he wouldn’t be tested.

Then there is the fact that a good deal of our personal portfolio seems to have disappeared. I know this is temporary, but it isn’t any fun at all. It is a good thing that we over-saved for retirement. Even after our substantial losses, all the retirement calculators say we’re still good. Also my retirement pay will almost certainly last longer than the down market will.

I’m an optimist, and one might as well look at the bright side. One positive to all of this is that my clients will have to start talking to their new advisors, because I won’t be available. It will probably make the client meetings go more smoothly. And as of Saturday, responsibility for my clients shifts to the new advisors, so there will be someone else to take care of them if I am out. And I have a mandatory 5 days off to putter around my house…