Lately I have been waking up with stiff ankles. Really stiff. Truthfully, I fairly hobble the first two or three steps out of bed. Thankfully its gone after that, except if I sit with my legs folded under me, which I do frequently. I’m a bit stiff then too. I called my dad to ask about this, and he told me that its probably the beginnings of arthritis. ARTHRITIS?? I’m 48. His advice? Just mention it to your doctor the next time you go, and don’t stop moving. Even though it hurts, moving is the best thing for it. Awesome.
I am remarkably healthy, and I intend to keep myself that way if at all possible. Two years ago I read “Younger Next Year” and it really changed the way I thought about health. For years I have eaten healthy, and since that book, I also exercise vigorously and regularly. I’m slim and in pretty good shape and I take exactly zero medications aside from the occasional allergy meds or aspirin and ibuprofen.
Nonetheless, I am beginning to feel my age. In addition the the occasional stiffness, I don’t sleep well anymore, I don’t tolerate alcohol well anymore, and I can see my age in the mirror. I have a few gray hairs, a few more wrinkles around my eyes, and even my hands are showing lines that weren’t there only a few years ago.
What I find most interesting though, is how we think about age, or more specifically, how age makes us think about people. The other day I was showing my kids a high school picture album, and I came across a picture of myself with my parents. I was 16 and my mom was a little younger than I am now. She was STUNNING. How did I never notice how beautiful my mom was? It might be that she’s my mom, but I don’t remember noticing how pretty her friends were either. They have very good looking children, and they are now very handsome 70 year old women. I suspect they were way above average looking. How did I miss this?
I have thought about it a lot, and I think we just do. Maybe humans see people their age and younger as somehow different and more relatable than people who are older. We notice young people because we’ve been there. And now that I am older, I’m seeing it from a whole different perspective.
A hilarious example is that a few years ago my husband and I were sitting in a cafe in a city in Eastern Europe. There weren’t very many Americans about, and a young lady (college age) at a nearby table struck up a conversation with us. Her mother was from this country and she was visiting relatives. She was very nice, and one of the most beautiful people I have ever seen in person. My husband was trying hard not to stare, and honestly I couldn’t blame him, she looked like a super-model.
When she said her farewells and walked away, I realized she had no idea that my husband admired her at all- because at 55, he was about the same age as her DAD. She could have been our kid, and that’s how she saw us- older folks about her parents age. Wow. Did men ever look at me that way when I was in my 20’s and I was completely oblivious? Do 60 and 70 year old men look at me that way now? Do we all only notice our generation and younger?
A year or so ago at the gym I was talking to some of the regulars between sets. We were joking around, and a guy slightly older than me made a mildly flirtatious comment. I laughed at him and walked away. A nearby 20-something guy (a regular at the gym) watched us with an expression of astonishment on his face. He stared at me as if he had never seen me before. Perhaps he hadn’t.
